Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Sleigh Bells brings the new "Kids" on the block

Brooklyn brings its finest.  We're talking in your face, no holds barred, absolute style in bits.  Imagine if Tom Morello was tearing it up at club owned by Jay Z.  And for a moment you swear that the crazy sexy girl singing is M.I.A.  Pay attention to the song "Kids" by Sleigh Bells and you might think back to the days when that beastie boy style was king.  This girl makes katie perry sound so two thousand and. um, well just so 2000 and zero.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Flo Rida and Akon wax philosophy.

Referring to their song: Who Dat Girl

Ever have that moment, when you see the most important chance in your life? There’s certainly a buzz that comes with imagining how things could/should play out.  Followed by the numb awe that comes with seeing all the obstacles that lie between...but the best part is figuring out if they’re real or imagined.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Bruno Mars--Songs More Theatrics than Substance?

Yo B_Mars, quit writing lyrics like you’re in middle school.  The only person you impress is probably your Olde Englishe teacher, he probably thought you didn’t know how to read.   Congrats, you defied his expectations.  But I must ask… ever since developing such an illustrious career, do you ever question the worth of your words?  Now when you say “I'd catch a grenade for ya, Throw my head on a blade for ya,
jump in front of a train for ya,” – does that mean I have to choose one, or can I get a bit of all three?  Cause if it’s the latter, I’d choose maybe like a spinning blade that chucks a grenade.

It's also real apparent that you’re writing out of your element when you mention that someone “cuts the breaks out your car.”  No doubt a pop singer from Hawaii, such as yourself, would be subject to these strategic attempts on your life.  Singing about traveling the world and seeing pretty girls probably warrants a bounty on your head somewhere, maybe in Tajikistan or Qatar (which btw is the only English noun to have an A after a Q, instead of a U).  But c’mon, real threats on you boy America?  You’re about as hate-able as Joey Chestnut.  Not a chance!

Well; I’m sold Bruno Marz.  Consider me your biggest Number 1 fan.  So if I ever need you to catch a grenade for me, I’m counting on it.

Monday, January 17, 2011

Why I love MLK Jr. Day.

For the last seven years I’ve gotten a few hours or even the full day off every 3rd Monday of January in observation of his birthday (which is actually on the 15th).  Created by the U.S. just like Kwanzaa, in celebration of black heritage.  MLK Jr. Day knows its worth—it doesn’t demand we go out and frivolously spend money or gorge ourselves with life shortening treats.  Instead, it suggests we chill out and love what we do have in our life.  To fully express my appreciation, I hugged a black person today – well kinda... native american

So here are 10 reasons I love MLK Jr. Day [what it stands for] and why you should too
1)      it’s a paid government holiday
2)      MLK Jr. is one of few who’s birthdays create a government holiday.  Others include George Washington, Christopher Columbus, and Jesus.  That’s quite a guest list.
3)      The U.S. kicks ass in Olympic sports, and not just in swimming and archery.
4)      Rap, Hip Hop, and R&B (and gospel and mo-town)
5)      Mya Marie Harris
6)      Dwayne Wade
7)      Learning How to Dougie
8)      The Chocolate Shake at The Weiners Circle in Chicago
9)      Obama (maybe)
10)   “I have a dream”—A speech that defines inspiration

Question of the day: Is Ke$ha Hot?

If you polled most guys this question they’d probably come to a consensus—no.    At least this is the answer I hear when people ask.  Before today I had never seen Kesha, but by evidence of her songs, I was skeptical that a young artist so full of energy and style couldn’t be attractive.  I consider myself an expert on beauty appreciation so I investigated.  This was a case for Detective Shin.  I watched a few videos—she’s not exactly a poster girl for Victoria’s Secret, but that doesn’t mean much, cause, well neither are you.  Sorry (not really).  

Let’s resolve this by mentioning her video for “Your Love is My Drug.”  Begin reel:  She’s waking up in the desert adorned in native apparel, wearing a tiger mask, and riding an elephant.  I’ll admit my first thoughts:  Aha.  She must be advocating for progression in Africa.—but my hunch was short lived after seeing a Joshua tree (see image below), only endemic to the Southwest U.S.   The idiosyncrasy dawned on me.   Pop stars can afford to fly an elephant to the Mojave Desert… Duh.   But honestly whoa, in serious touch with her inner animal.  She pushes on, about half way through the song, animation kicks in and transforms the reel into some sort of beat driven version of The Life Aquatic meets The Yellow Submarine directed by Salvador Dali.   She seals the deal by donning a boa constrictor on her glow in the dark paint covered body, which follows Newton’s fourth law:  Things that glow are better than things that don’t.  Kesha.   You've got sexy in your way.  I’m sold even though nobody else is.

 Joshua Trees Near the Outskirts of the Grand Canyon

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Part the Red Room Sea

Sweat. Warm, visceral, and wet. The drops that comprise saline. Steam rises from the skin of the crowd until it seems a veritable cloud hovers above...like proof of living, proof of livelihood. Music and lights drive the people below, pulsing with some sort of ordered chaos--the sum of all heart beats. Dancing at The Red Room may not be for the light of heart. You might find yourself neck deep in a sea of people trying to cut loose. You could try and fight the undertow, but sometimes its best to just let the tide take you. The crowded conditions at Red Room are a fire hazard for sure...but I guess that puts the onus on you, to not heat things up, too fast at least. 

The Red Room is located just north of Guilford and  Broad Ripple Ave, 2nd floor.  Cover $5

Friday, January 14, 2011

The Gyro Joint Venture

Have you ever been lost, confused, and disorientated? Ever asked yourself "why am I so tired, hungry, and drunk? And why is it 3AM?" No need to worry about the past, but it is now the time to focus on basic survival skills. This is where an establishment like The Gyro Joint comes in handy. Strategically located in the center of Broad Ripple Avenue, this mediterranean shop serves as a mecca to those who seek nourishment in the wee hours of the morning. Fortunately for us they have some pretty good lamb served right off a searing rotating skewer, served in a pocket of downy pita bread, and lathered in cucumber sauce. Price ~$6 U.S. They also have meat pies strangely enough(which are often served in Australia). Once you get some food in your stomach, you can figure out more important questions, like how the hell am I gonna get back home?

Original Gyro Joint on Urbanspoon

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Breathe easy, you're on Bourbon street

Bourbon Street Distillery is quite possibly one of my favorite places to go on a summer's night.  Throughout the year they have dollar domestic drafts (mondays only) and a selection of cajun style foods.  The irony in Bourbon's cuisine is that its significantly better than actual authentic cajun that you find down in Low-oui-zee-a-na.  New Orleans (or N'awlins) is aptly called the Big Easy because the citizens simply do not give a shit, with work ethics that rival their cleanliness.  Pride in quality is not their strong suit... but that is neither here nor there.  Back to naptown.  Some of Bourbon Street Distillery's better items include their finger licking fish-and-chips, the classic oyster po-boys, and their pore cleansing buffalo burgers.  Add a handful of dollar drafts, some close friends, a table out on the deck, a cool summer breeze, and a view of the city-- you'll find yourself looking forward to Mondays.

BSD is located on the corner of Indiana and Vermont near downtown.

Bourbon Street Distillery on Urbanspoon

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

It's not Rock, its Rock Lobster

Ladies.  Feeling down in the dumps?  Life got you in a stranglehold?  Your boyfriend just leave you...for someone younger, hotter, and better in pretty much every way?  Well, I can tell you exactly how to get back at him!  Actually, just kidding.  I wouldn't teach you how to do that (you vengeful cuckold), but what I can tell you is how to improve your self esteem--for about 25 minutes.  Its a simple recipe.  Take two shots, get a DD or taxi to drive you to The Rock Lobster (no cover) in Broad Ripple, and dance it up Taio Cruz style.  Provided the Lobster isn't empty (if you go after 11:30pm), you'll have plenty of guys approaching you...and even some girls that wanna rock their bodies.  Now make sure you don't stay too long, cause even the ball turned south for Cinderella after curfew.  The longer you stay, the more you risk losing yourself, having more drinks, feeling bold, talking to strangers... and we all know where that goes.  No worries though, if you pull a Katherine Heigl you can always get sushi and crepes to make you feel classy again.


Tuesday, January 11, 2011

When in Brugge

Now where can you find jerk, miso, and curry sauces all on the same menu?  Follow that with pâté, crepes, et Prince Edward Island mussels and you'll soon find yourself a far way from Kansas.  While Brugge's European style menu does not boast a vast array of tastes, it certainly has more than a few distinct dishes you won't be finding soon at a TGIF near you.  Certainly, Brugge has much to offer to anybody with a curious palatte, but even for those who enjoy simpler flavors they hit a homerun (or at least a Tripel).  What am I speaking of?  The frites of course!  I would be exaggerating if I said the frites were amazing, but they're pretty damn good.  Deftly seasoned-peppered fries with a crisp exterior and firm substance that will make you think of what your grandma's fries could have been (sorry grandma).  The next question is which sauce to use.  Remember, Europeans don't use ketchup, but rather cream based sauces.--Samuel L. Jackson once eloquently said, "you know what they put on their fries in Holland instead of ketchup?   Mayonnaise, they drown 'em in it."  So go ahead, experiment, indulge, and make those frites swim in it.  Don't worry, no one's judging ;)

Brugge Brasserie located in Broad Ripple, Indianapolis, IN.  Go there.

Brugge Brasserie on Urbanspoon